Stupid Things on the Internet, Part Whatever

There are many, many contenders for stupidest thing on the Internet. One of the main contenders for the title this week was an article entitled how to talk to a woman who's wearing headphones. Now, the obvious answer for anybody who has two brain cells to rub together is "you don't, unless there's some kind of fire, flood or other emergency."

As frequently happens when stupid gets loose on the Internet, various parties make an attempt to drop a net on it and (with varying degrees of gentleness) move the stupid to a safe place. Two such responses I found interesting.

1) From Holly Messinger, Literary Assassin - self-defense against schmucks who try to make you take your headphones off. She is Not Amused. A sample: Make him speak first. He may genuinely need information like directions or the date and year, if he's a time traveler. But if you're in a crowded place and he chose to interrupt the girl with the headphones on, odds are he's just being an entitled fuckwhistle.

2) From Ursula Vernon, humorous: We took a vote. A sample:
Someone always says it, whenever it comes up:
"I guess I'm just not allowed to talk to anyone any more!"

Well.
Yes.
It is my duty to inform you that we took a vote
all us women
and determined that you are not allowed to talk to anyone
ever again.

This vote is legally binding.